Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Where did the Magic go?

Hi everyone. It has been nine days since I last wrote. In that time, I have not practiced the magic at all. I fell off the wagon and I hit bottom.

I looked around the house and utter despair consumed me. Nothing changes. Nothing gets better. Why even try?

Sunday was a blur. I slept most of Monday. And I slept until noon today.

Both days, my Mom came here. On Monday she gathered all the dirty clothes and took them to a laundromat. It was a mountain that I did not want to tackle.

Today she washed dishes. The kitchen looked like a hurricane had hit it. The counters and stove were covered with all kinds of crap. It took my Mom a few hours to straighten up that mess.

While Mom was working away in the kitchen, I stood there staring off into space. I needed to talk about it. I stammered because I didn't know how to begin explaining the way I was feeling.

Mom listened. Then she told me how she was feeling. She comes over to my house to do the dishes. To do the laundry. To help out in any way she can. She comes here to have something to do but more importantly  she does it for her baby, me. And she does it for Faith and Sidney. 

Those two sweet little angels deserve the best. They deserve to have a clean home. Clean clothes. 

Those two little girls deserve so much more. They deserve to be surrounded by positive happy people who get out there and live life.

My Mom was right.

The house got tidied. The laundry got put away. And me? I got dressed. Something I haven't done in the last three or four days. I even brushed my hair. 

I held my gratitude stone tonight. I am most grateful to my Mom for helping me see what was right. 

Tomorrow? I will start my day with magical footsteps and see how it goes from there.

Please throw some magic dust my way. 

 When was the last time you felt down? And what did you do to get back up?

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